Stressballs Attack!
By Santino
Truck driver Zack Johnson has always been an angry person according to everyone who knows him. He recently bought a stress ball. A stress ball is a small rubber ball filled with sand. When you are angry, you are supposed to squeeze it, and transfer your frustration to it. Mostly, whenever someone uses it, they just get angrier. This is what happened to Mr. Johnson and many other consumers.
When Stress Balls R US employee John Smith bought a stress ball, he got angrier and angrier. As his hand repeatedly squeezed the stress ball his hand hurt more and more. Tiny teeth over a millimeter tall bit his hand.
“I was squeezing the stress ball when I saw tiny teeth biting my fingers.”
Mr Smith works at the factory that made the stress balls. He said, “I am not surprised. The stress balls get angry being squeezed, and we are a source of stress to them.”
The factory, Stress Balls ‘R US, is recalling the stress balls. Some people have been sent to the hospital with hand injuries from the biting balls. Linda Evans is suing Stress Balls ‘R Us for hand injuries, and for creating more stress.
As a result the factory has since changed their product. The stress balls are now being stuffed with feathers, since they believe that the sand was the source of the problem. Scientists thought that the sand may be somewhat alive. Some reports are coming in that the stress balls are now flying away from their users.
Police officer Joe McDonald bought several of the new feather stress balls. He has since gone missing. Neighbors have reported looking out and seeing John Smith flying out his window while holding on to several stress balls.
Most of the community has suggested that if you have stress, just CALM DOWN.